The Sunday Best....

Minister's £60,000 expenses for parents' home: 'Rumbled' Tony McNulty drops claim... then calls for it to be curtailed. Another Labour Crook!

Dispatched: The post office boss who insisted his customers speak English. Disgraceful. If the Muslems don't like it here they can leave.

Stasi HQ UK... where details of all your journeys are secretly logged and kept for a decade. WTF!!! The governments record with 'security' and computer systems is not good.

Cripes! Boris's plan to celebrate St George (and to blazes with what the PC brigade think). Good ole Boris.

Desperate search for goose left with crossbow embedded in its back after sickening attack. Find the thugs and do the same to them.

Anyone amputated below the knees calls himself Scratcher - as in 'it's just a scratch'. Incredibly brave guys.

Trust bankers? You'd be safer on the Titanic. True.

UK to remain in deflation trap until 2012, economists warn. We are in deep trouble.

Britain to join 'civilian surge' in Afghanistan. Only because we don't have any more troops to spare.

Hunt supporters say decision to drop charges against three hunt masters proves ban has failed. Bye bye ban.

Labour spends 'more on rail consultants than trains'. Jobs for the boys. How much of their fees come back to Labour as donations to party funds?

Bikini wax ban becomes too hairy for officials. Not such a smooth ride!

RAF bomb the Taliban from 8,000 miles away. We need more Predators..

Minister in charge of offshore clampdown ran tax haven firm. Is there anyone in Labour who isn't a crook?

Officers attack 'MoD muddle'. The military will always suffer while the MoD exists. They do not need a ministry.

Democrat anger at Obama overkill. Even his own side don't like him.

Grace Mugabe is immune from prosecution in Hong Kong. She is not immune from the people of Zimbabwe who will get her eventually.

Sergeant Duane Edwards: you grow up fast fighting a war. Good lad.

Chavez cuts budget over oil price. Socialism doesn't come cheap.

the Clarkypoos bit......

You’re a bunch of overpaid nancies – and I love you.

Alfa Romeo MiTo

and little Jimmy May....

Present incorrect.