News....

Recession? Not in the public sector where state workers are unscathed as cuts ravage jobs market. The Public sector tends to vote Labour so they will be safe. If it bankrupts Britain, Labour won't care.

Police accountability plan scrapped after backlash from from senior officers. The last thing the Police want is to be accountable. They might be forced to go out and catch criminals.

I may scrap the congestion zone altogether, says Boris. Boris being sensible. That's a first.

Army forced to bull JCBs and paint them in camouflage colours to clear warzones. Another MoD f**k up.

Jaguar in line for taxpayer bail-out. What do ministers and their bodyguards drive around in? Expect a sizable donation to the Labour party for this one.

Big cut in Opec oil production fails to stop prices falling to 4½-year low. Time OPEC took a beating.

President Kgalema Motlanthe takes swipe at UK over Robert Mugabe. President Who?

American commandos get UN go-ahead to hunt down Somali pirates. Happy Hunting.

35 Iraqi officials arrested over coup plot: report. Once an Arab.....

8 really, really scary predictions. You think things are bad now. And Britain is in a far worse state than the US.

Russia provides 10 MiG fighter jets to Lebanon for free. Show's how much a Mig is worth if you have to give them away.