Classic Quotes......

'The secret of a good sermon is to have a good beginning and a good ending; and to have the two as close together as possible.' - George Burns

'Santa Claus has the right idea. Visit people only once a year.' - Victor Borge

'Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.' - Mark Twain

'By all means, marry. If you get a good wife, you'll become happy; if you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.' - Socrates

'I was married by a judge. I should have asked for a jury.' - Groucho Marx

'My wife has a slight impediment in her speech. Every now and then she stops to breathe.' - Jimmy Durante

'My luck is so bad that if I bought a cemetery, people would stop dying.' - Rodney Dangerfield

'I don't feel old. I don't feel anything until noon. Then it's time for my nap.' - Bob Hope

'We could certainly slow the aging process down if it had to work its way through Congress.' - Will Rogers

'Don't worry about avoiding temptation. As you grow older, it will avoid you.'
- Winston Churchill

'Maybe it's true that life begins at fifty .. But everything else starts to wear out, fall out, or spread out.' - Phyllis Diller

'By the time a man is wise enough to watch his step, he's too old to go anywhere.' - Billy Crystal

H/Ts Shelly & M Kohl