News...

North Korea's Kim Jong-il fails to show at anniversary parade amid rumours he suffered stroke. I didn't know he had enough brain to have a stroke.

Eichmann abduction chief calls for Israel to kidnap Iranian 'war criminal' Ahmadinejad. Just shoot the little s**t before he starts a war.

John McCain's team mocks Gordon Brown over Barack Obama backing. Brown has always been a loser.

Farmers fear harvest could be the worst since 1968. We haven't even got to the spuds yet.

Silicon Valley answers Bletchley Park's SOS with $100,000 donation. Thanks tho them, but you have to ask why no British Companies have donated.