The Sunday Best...

MoD fury as Brown wields axe. Military coup time. The military need to take matters into their own hands. It is the only way to save themselves and Britain.

UK's last 1,000 soldiers rushed out to Balkans. Give the idiots at the MOD an old Lee-Enfield and send them instead. They won't be missed.

Nato should not offer a free ride to parasites. As some of us have been saying for a while. Nice of the press to wake up.

Top psychiatrist concludes liberals are clinically nuts! Ok lets go round them all up!!

Iranians urge Dutch to ban film. Hopefully the Dutch will tell them where to go.

Diplomatic crisis looms as French bugs 'discovered in UK Defence Minister's office'. Ze notty leetle Froggies!!!

Britain braced for the big freeze with temperatures set to drop to -9 overnight A tad nippy, what!!!

Blinker Brown: Well, that's Tony's nickname for you anyway Gordon. I prefer 'The Caledonian C**T!!'

China mounts dissident assault before Games. Which idiot's gave the Olympics to China? Oh yes the same ones who gave them to Britain!! China doesn't deserve them and we can't afford them.

Anti-foxhunting campaign is ban's real victim. Tally ho. A bunch of leftie scum put in their place by the 'Countryfolk'. Never tell an Englishman what he canor can't do. We don't like it!!

Stolen Victoria Crosses recovered. The thieves should be sent to Afghanistan to learn a bit of respect for our fighting men!

Egypt shocked by 'foul-mouthed' Gaza cousins. Palestinian pigs!! Israel should push them into the sea, a sort of Gadarene Swine for the noughties!!

Cherie Blair backs £10,000 wage for prisoners. Moronic bitch!

Falklands hero backs soldier’s payout battle. A f**king disgrace.

Outgoing BAE Systems chief Mike Turner warns of defence spending risk to Britain. As BAE are incapable of delivering anything on time or budget I think he should shut up. Name one BAE contract that has come in on time and on budget! We won't discuss whether the kit works or not when we get it.

War hero told: You can't have jabs to save sight until you are blind in one eye. Another f**king disgrace.

Do-or-die Hillary turns bully as Obama starts to pull away. It's going to get dirty.

'Retrain ex-troops' as teachers. Poor sods don't deserve that. Instead of imposing suffering onto our ex servicemen send the bloody yobs to Iraq and Afghanistan. Let's see how bloody tough they are when being shot at!

Terrorists recruiting on net via Facebook. The bastards get everywhere.